The Netherlands to put Reef on Reefers

Amsterdam – The Netherlands government wants to institute a ban on marijuana in public coffee shops. Foreigners will no longer be getting high in the lowlands. Are snack-makers in a panic?

The Netherlands new, conservative government will ban on foreigners buying marijuana in public coffee shops by the end of the year. “Bummer dude.”

This is being viewed as a blow to tourism in one of Europe’s most lenient soft-drug countries. Government sources have cited an attempt to improve public health and safety as the reason for the new legislation.

So much for Rasta, fast food and late-night, aebleskivers.

The Netherlands will now go the path of more conservative governments in Europe that must deal covertly with the underground sale of the green, purported gateway drug.

Call out the undercover cops and start manning the alleys and street corners. No word yet from fast food distributors as to the possible effect on sales from the weed ban, but take away fat spliffs on an Amsterdam, Friday night and you’re left with tourists that aren’t going to touch the bland food or frequent the red light districts with the same aplomb.

Are the Netherlands truly going down in smoke? It hardly seems possible. Amsterdam has around 220 coffee shops that sell marijuana from mild, commercial grades to industrial strength knockouts nicknamed “herijuana.”

What will this do to the college crowd? Coffee Shops are a huge tourist attraction. The coffee’s good and so is the pastry, but you don’t go to a bullfight to see dairy cows.

Time will tell if the fabulous stoner palaces of the north will fall victim to conservative policy, but if you’re planning on getting high in the lowlands, you had better book a trip before November.

The southern provinces of Limburg, Zeeland, and Noord-Brabant will be affected by the end of the year with the rest of the country following suit next year. The new law will ban foreigners from purchasing pot or even entering a coffee shop that sells pot.

Netherlands resident patrons who still want to get baked in a coffee shop will have to register with their favorite shop and this will be limited to 1500 individuals per shop.
Brownie sales at adjacent bakeries are expected to skyrocket and residents will undoubtedly be drinking more coffee outdoors with jackets containing lots of deep pockets.

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K.W. Bowlin

Southern California native. Passion for history, particularly big, ugly battles. Loves all stringed instruments. Never hit a good 2-iron in his life. Writes like a fiend. Married to his best friend, high school sweetheart and crack photographer Mary, and has four fantastic, grown kids and a Lhasa Apso puppy named Coby.

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